"I don't want to hurt that person." - This is a statement most of us if not all of us have used at one point or another. What does it really mean though? Is it a compassionate statement? A caring statement? Or not?
Though it sounds compassionate and caring, most of the time the truth is that you are afraid to face and/or confront the person you are saying this about. You mask this fear with a 'positive' front, while it really has a selfish/self serving purpose of making you (and others) believe that you mean well, while in reality you are covering your fear of conflict and/or change.
Next time you find yourself saying this, stop and think about what you are trying to avoid doing. What are you afraid of? Be honest with yourself and look at your fear, whatever it may be. Then find the courage to be true to yourself and reflect that in your actions. This way you are doing a great service not just to yourself, but also to the person you are dealing with.
By being all that you can be you give the other person permission to be all that they can be too. Tough the situation may be tough and painful, the best resolutions will be found through a heart centered, non-fear based approach.
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