Enjoy The Now

Enjoy the now!  When something extreme happens to you or someone else, you are always reminded of how precious every moment is and how important it is to be truly present.  It makes you stop, think and evaluate your past actions and life in general.

It is also a reminder to live and show up to life in a way that leaves you with no regrets.  When you choose to live an authentic life there is no need to live in regret later when something unexpected does happen.

Anger And Sadness

Anger is a front behind which, most of the time, sadness is hiding.  Next time you get angry stop and think about this.  See if you can feel the sadness hiding.  Give yourself permission to feel and release it.  By letting it come through you are allowing healing to take place too.

Sometimes, all the reasoning in the world won't help you heal as much as consciously feeling the sadness.  Not everything can be solved through reasoning and tears are wonderful healers.

Mirroring

"Whatever happens around you, don't take it personally.  Nothing other people do is because of you.  It is because of themselves."  by Don Miguel Ruiz

Have you ever shared one thing, i.e. a personal experience, with two people at the same time, to later find out, that even though they both heard the same words coming out of your mouth, they each heard a different story?  How does this happen?

Each person has a different set of experiences, biases, problems, solutions, ways of viewing himself and the world, etc..  These 'filters' skew your everyday life which leads to such situations.  

When someone reacts strongly to something you say to him, it means that something deep inside of that person has been triggered.  Some aspect of his personal self that he most likely is ignoring and/or refusing to look at was mirrored to him in what you were saying.

This is especially true when the reaction is out of proportion with the content of what was said.  When you are faced with emotional outbursts of that sort it is not always easy to keep a level head.  The growth opportunity is to do exactly that though, to truly understand that it is not about you, but that that person is having an internal wake-up call, letting them know that they are not looking at something, that something is out of balance within them.

Keep in mind that this is a two way street...so whenever you get angry, the same applies to you.  The minute you do look inside and figure out why you are reacting, I can guarantee that you will instantly stop being angry. The anger stops as soon as you identify what it is that you are not looking at.  It stops as soon as you shine the light on the dark spot that is hiding.

Detach From Drama

When your life seems to be upside down and/or out of control, what is the best thing to do?  Detach from the drama!  Here is a suggested way on how to do this:

1. Breathe!  Close your eyes and clear your mind.  Use your breath to achieve this state.
2. Step outside of your current reality.  Become the neutral observer of your life.
3. Look at your situation from this neutral place and assess it.
4. Ask yourself:  "What am I supposed to learn from this situation?  What can I do to alter it?"
5. Once you have your answer, follow it.  :)

Living in the drama of life is very energy draining.  You are reacting and constantly trying to put out fires.  There is no room for responding to life.  Detaching from drama is the first step to awakening, to becoming more conscious and living in your light.

Take that first step.  You will be glad you did if you haven't already.  :)

Tools

The world is and will always be a part of every one's life.  Children are influenced by all they see and experience.  Parents do have a special role in their lives in that they are usually the closest to the children and thus also the first role models.

Controlling the external world is impossible.  Sheltering your children works up to a point.  There is a time when they do need to experience the world and make their own mistakes, when they do need to learn to keep up with our fast changing technological world and not loose their identity.

Instead of controlling the world around them, when you lead by example you are planting "coping seeds" in your children. By modeling your ideals and showing how you implement them on a daily basis in interactions with them and the world around, you are giving them tools they can use when they find themselves in similar situations. Modeling behavior doesn't mean that you have to be perfect.  Quite the contrary.  It is how you respond to mistakes that makes a difference.  It is about how you show up in the good AND in the bad that counts.  The broader the exposure, i.e. the more open you are (and that also means you adapting to and keeping up with this ever changing world), the larger the tool arsenal for your children.

The more positive tools children are given on their way, the better off they will be when they do face the world on their own.  That is why parents are so important.  They are the first tool makers.  :)

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Your Life Path

"Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart.  Who looks outside, dreams.  Who looks inside, awakes." by Carl Jung

If you are wondering where to find what your life path is, here is your answer.  Know your heart!  When you look inside you can start seeing where you are headed and what is best for you.  You will most likely need to remove some obstacles, but directing your attention inward with the full commitment of seeing is the first step.

Life

Here is an interesting perspective for you to ponder today:

Life is not about changing who you are, but about learning & mastering who you are at the core and then living your life true to your essence as you are learning!

This also applies to how you deal with others...  What if, instead of trying to change others you support them in uncovering who they are and in living their life accordingly?

I believe a world of change can come about with this shift in perspective.

"I Don't Want To Hurt You"

"I don't want to hurt that person." - This is a statement most of us if not all of us have used at one point or another.  What does it really mean though?  Is it a compassionate statement? A caring statement?  Or not?

Though it sounds compassionate and caring, most of the time the truth is that you are afraid to face and/or confront the person you are saying this about.  You mask this fear with a 'positive' front, while it really has a selfish/self serving purpose of making you (and others) believe that you mean well, while in reality you are covering your fear of conflict and/or change.

Next time you find yourself saying this, stop and think about what you are trying to avoid doing.  What are you afraid of?  Be honest with yourself and look at your fear, whatever it may be.  Then find the courage to be true to yourself and reflect that in your actions.  This way you are doing a great service not just to yourself, but also to the person you are dealing with.

By being all that you can be you give the other person permission to be all that they can be too.  Tough the situation may be tough and painful, the best resolutions will be found through a heart centered, non-fear based approach.

Earth Day

Today is Earth Day.  This is a great opportunity to think about what you can do to help Mother Earth.  Every little thing helps.  Whether it is picking up a piece of trash, recycling, planting a tree, carpooling, turning off your engine while at the bank drive through, etc.

What can you do to make a difference?  Why not pick one small thing you can do every day for the next year?  Earth deserves it and we owe it to ourselves and our children.  Even something as small as sending loving thoughts every day to Mother Earth.  What do you choose to do?

Love and Light to our beautiful planet, now and always!

Transition

Two of my kids were gone over the weekend, giving me a sneak peak of what it will be like when they are gone, which really is not far away.  I very much enjoyed the additional free time and on the flip side felt their absence.  It made me think about how important it is for you to move with the changes happening, how important it is to not just work externally but to have inner growth.  The more aware and present you are the easier the transition.

Your life needs to have a deeper meaning than just your everyday tasks.  Otherwise, once your tasks are done all that remains is emptiness.  Take time to become more and more familiar with yourself.  You are an amazing being who can effortlessly ride the changing tides.  All it takes is knowing yourself, merging with your Higher Self, embracing your Divine Spark.

Living In The Light

""Living in the light" involves travelling into the darker places within ourselves and shining the light of our consciousness into them so that we can truly love and express all that we are." by Shakti Gawain from her book 'Living in the Light'

This quote is a straight forward summary of how to achieve living your light and why.  Every time you choose to look at an aspect of yourself that you have been ignoring, hiding or burying, you are on your way to balance and harmony, you are one step closer to being whole.

In the process you also strengthen your intuition, which links you to your inner guidance, your higher self, your soul.  The path can be as simple as that quote in essence.

Receiving

On a scale from one to ten (one being closed and ten fully open) how open do you believe you are to receiving help, love, kindness, compassion, etc.?  For example, if someone where to give you an unexpected gift are you able to accept it wholeheartedly?  Or do you feel uncomfortable, think you have to reciprocate, wonder what the reason is behind this present, or even feel guilty, like you don't deserve it?

Giving from the heart is an art form.  Receiving with an open heart is an art form too.  As a compassionate person you put a lot of emphasis on giving, but remember that knowing how to receive is equally important!

For the next 24 hrs observe how open you are to receiving.  Expect goodness and allow it to fill you.  You deserve it and you are worthy of it.  Accepting love is truly equal to giving love.  Let go of any thoughts and judgments and let love in.  Enjoy.

Thoughts

What if every thought you have manifested instantly?  Take a moment (or a day!) and vigilantly "listen" to your thoughts with that question in mind.  If each thought came true, what would your world be like?

While thoughts don't instantly come to life, they are energy, energy that you are sending out into the Universe.      The Universe will respond in turn matching your energy.  If you believe that you are lucky and that life is good to you, it will manifest that way.  The reverse is true to.

Pay attention to your thoughts.  There is a lot of creative power stored in them.  Make them count for yourself and for all.

I am sending you mine:  Love and Light to all.  :)

Circumstance Vs. Unfolding Potential

"Do circumstances rule your life or do you focus on unfolding potential--what wants to happen in service of something larger than you?" by Alan Seale.

WOW.  What a powerful question!  It is crystal clear that when circumstances rule your world you are completely out of control and possibly the victim in your life!  You are like a log in the ocean being erratically pushed this way and that way, with no direction, no purpose, no rhyme or reason.

On the other hand when you are unfolding potential you are working with the Universe, with yourself and the big picture.  You are creating, being, shining, centered, hopeful.  There is a direction, a purpose, a reason for your being.  What an empowering position to be in!  What a joy filled existence!!!

Increase your intuition

How do you increase your intuition?  Like all muscles you need to work your intuition too!

The best place to start is by trusting your intuition.  When you have a gut feel, or your heart is telling you something, acknowledge and then follow it, even if your brain tells you otherwise.

You will start to experience what it is like to follow your instinct. Be open to the new experience and see what comes of it.  You will see that it pays to trust your gut and that the more you use it the more it will become second nature to you.

It is quite the journey that truly also strengthens your self reliance and self trust.  Have fun with it.  :)

Answers

What would it be like if you had all the answers?  What would it be like if you didn't have to look beyond yourself for answers?

The amazing thing about you is that all the answers are within you.  Coaching is based on this fundamental belief.  A coach empowers you to find the answers within and gives you tools to find them yourself.

Accepting this concept of all the answers being in you is very empowering.  While not all answers are at the tip of your tongue and you may have to dig deep for some others, it helps you own your life and know that you can make a difference and that you can change your reality.  It also leads you to taking full responsibility of your life.

Freedom

What is true freedom?  If you were to define freedom what would you say?

Here is my definition:

"Freedom is having no place within that you are afraid to go to."

You are free when you are one with who you are, accepting and embracing all parts and pieces, understanding all of you.  When the internal struggle ceases you can experience true freedom.  :)

Stuck? In A Rut?

What questions could you ask yourself when you feel like you are stuck or in a rut?  Here are some suggestions:

Where would you rather be?  What would it look like?
What does the world look like outside the rut?
What is weighing you down?
What is missing for you?
What would bring joy back into your life?
What is the one baby step you can take to get out?

SMART Goals

When I started my coaching training, one of the first things I learned about were SMART goals and here is what they are:

Specific - when you start setting your goal be specific.  Make sure you know exactly what it is you are trying to achieve.

Measurable - how will you know you have succeeded?  By having measurable parameters you know how close or far you are from your goal.

Adjustable - when you are pursuing a goal things might change.  Be open to change and adjust your goal as needed.

Realistic - saying you want to become a guru in a week is probably not very realistic.  Make sure what you want to achieve is within the realm of possibilities.  You may certainly stretch yourself and you limits, after all that is what goals are for, but keep it real.  :)

Time-based - Give your goals a realistic time frame.  It really helps you focus and gives you something specific to strive for.

I really like this approach.  It is a great guideline which helps make things happen for you. Enjoy!

Milestone

This is my 100th post!  Wow, what a milestone.  WAHOO!  Yes, I am celebrating.  :)

In honor of this day I want to share some of what I have learned from blogging a daily insight:

1. It is amazing that no matter how mundane or routine your day was that there is always a nugget of wisdom hidden in every day.

2. Wisdom talks across cultures - there are no boundaries.  People are people and we all suffer and love, laugh and want to be loved.  Underneath it all we are all one.

3. Heart centered insights are timeless.  They are not affected by time or age.

4. Insights strike people at different times.  What may not speak to you today, might make sense to you and really be an 'a-ha' moment for you a month later.

5. Collecting your thoughts in writing once a day helps your growth.  The writing and sharing process makes the insights more tangible and more memorable.  It anchors them in you, ultimately helping you be who you want to be.

I am thrilled to have started on this journey and am looking forward to my next 100 posts. Thank you for travelling this path with me.  :)

Self-Worth

How do you determine what you are worth?  What is your self-worth?

Dr.Wayne Dyer has this to say:  "Self-worth comes from one thing - thinking that you are worthy!"

There is so much truth in that statement.  What you believe and think is fundamental to your self-worth.

If you believe that others are right about what they say and think about you, then that will reflect in your self-worth making it volatile, shaky and out of control for you.

If you trust in your own standards, then that too will reflect in your self-worth. In this case you are limited by your beliefs, but more in control.

And finally if you live from your center from the light within it will shine through your whole being bringing your self worth into complete balance and harmony with the Universe.

Just one more reason to live your light...  :)

Growth Cycle

When you work on expanding your world there are periods of growth and periods of stagnation.  During these 'flat spots' it feels like nothing is happening and you aren't moving...  

The role of this stagnation period is very important though.  It is the time you need to process your growth consciously and/or subconsciously, to see what your new reality feels like, to walk in your new shoes.  Sometimes it is simply time to recoup, your resting period so to speak.  Other times yet it feels like a maturation process needs to take place before you can start your new growth spurt, even though you may not understand it or know what is going on.

Part of growing is this time of 'no-growth'.  Be good to yourself when you are in that stage.  It is part of your growth process.  Embrace it as such.  :)

Time

When you feel like you do not have enough time and you are getting stressed because of it, try this:

1. Stop and BREATHE.
2. Repeat this mantra out loud until you feel its truth:
"Time is on my side.  There is enough time to get everything done."

This very simple exercise will help you refocus and calm down, thus empowering you to be more productive.  Try it. It works for me.  :)

True You

What would it be like to give up who you or others think you are?  To disassociate yourself from all the parameters you define yourself by, the degrees, achievements and accomplishments you have accumulated over the years, all the things you have done, the story you have built around yourself?

What would be left?  Or, better said: who are you when you are not defined by your story?  How would you describe yourself?  Who are you at the core?  Who is the true you?

Then, from that new perspective, look at your world.  What do you see?

Spring

Spring is here.  The trees are budding and somehow you can feel that the thick of winter is over.  It struck me today how we make New Year's resolutions and was wondering why not make New Season resolutions, commitments that are in harmony with the changing of the season?  

Every season has its own beauty.  Spring is all about the new, the coming back alive, waking up from a slumber, being outdoors, breathing fresh air and sniffing spring flowers.  Animals come out of hibernation and food becomes more abundant again.  Vibrant colors start popping up everywhere.  All senses come back to life.

Maybe this spring you may want to work on expanding your senses?  Spending more time in Nature? Coming out of your slumber? Choosing more vibrant colors?  Eating fresher, less processed food? Etc.  What do you think?

Personal Space

Do you have a special place in your home that is your own?  A place where you can just be, meditate, pray?  A place you go to for a little peace of mind, R&R?  If you don't, I highly recommend it.

It doesn't need to be a whole room.  It can be as simple as a corner and as elaborate as a room or more.  I have a small bookshelf that also serves as a table.  On the shelf I keep self-help/spiritual books that are meaningful to me and on the top I have placed items that have personal/spiritual meaning to me.  Next to it is a chair that I sit in when I meditate or pray, or simply breathe and rest.

This is my "special" place where I recharge my battery, a physical place that feels "sacred" to me and where I am surrounded by good energy.  When you have special place that is yours, you are physically reminded to take breaks and to seek your center.  Over time you will be able to achieve this centered space faster and that the energy vibrates higher in that location.  You will find over time too that just looking at the place will be soothing and peaceful to you.  :)

Handing Over Responsibility

How do you help your children take more responsibility? There probably are a millions answers to this question, that can probably best be summarized like this: With a lot of trial & error and patience!  :)

However, I do want to share one little tip that has really been working for our family (it is the first time we have tried this).  We have been in a new city every day for the last 4 days.  We challenged the kids to find a local, non chain restaurant every night.  They were game and started by consulting the Internet, then each other and finally told us where we were going.

The results have been awesome!  Every night has been a unique, delectable, memorable experience.  Somehow they managed to find very diverse, fun, yummy places to eat at, that we usually would have never gone to.  Three of them looked like holes in the wall...  One had super delicious pizza, even if it was only take out.  The second turned out to be quite upscale with tapas from all over the world and the third was a great burger joint where you could choose from 5 different types of potatoes (yes, we are in Idaho!), bison vs. beef, exotic side dishes and 10 different sauces (my favorite!).  The fourth restaurant was great too.

The lesson: get your kids involved and be open to change.  :)  Have FUN!!!

Set Your Intentions

What are your first thoughts in the morning when you wake up?  Are they ruled by what you think your day will be like?  Are they full of your 'to do list'?  Are you already planning before you get out of bed?

What about starting your day first with a deep cleansing breath, followed by a positive intention for your whole day like: "Today is my day.  Things will go my way."  Choose your own words.  Instead of being ruled by "everyday life" become the ruler of your day. 

Energy will follow.  It is at your command. You start creating your day the minute you get up.  Your thoughts are energy and energy movers.  Make them count for you and see what happens.  :)

When To Help...

Have you ever experienced trying to help someone, without avail?  Though you may mean well, jumping in and helping someone is not always the best thing to do. 

Here are some general guidelines I have learned to follow prior to trying to rescue everyone in need that might be of use to you too:

1. Does the person want to be helped?  During the CPR certification I took last month we were taught that  before you help anyone you need to ask them first if they want to be helped.  That fully applies to all situations, not just to physical ailments.

2. Is the person open/willing to change?  Don't assume that because a person is "miserable" that they want to change.  People are often invested in their misery and they do get something out of creating these types of situations (e.g. sympathy and compassion).

3. Be sure you are doing it for the right reasons too.  Saving someone else may make you feel good, like you are needed and useful, but it gives you a skewed view of the situation and will make you less effective in being able to truly help.  It is best to be in a place of complete unconditional love to help others.  :)

Laughter

What makes people gel and be in harmony together? Nothing works faster than laughter!  It is infectious, bubbly, freeing, calming and releases negative energy.  It is wonderful bonding energy.  :)